Gabriella Gometra

One Unwed Pregnant Teenager's Story



Posted: Tuesday, March 30, 2010

by Gabriella Gometra

Ever bash on a pregnant 16 year old? Tell her she made a stupid choice? Ever wonder why she dropped out of high school? Being pregnant that young, believe it or not, is a lot harder then being 18 or older and pregnant. Why? Not only do you have the stress of pregnancy, you have the stress of your peers, your teachers, parents, and everyone else in the community turning their nose up to you. There is also the stress of finishing school, while keeping a job so that you can support your new baby. While your friends go to prom, you sit at home and cry because there isn't a dress that will fit your belly. While they go and get hammered, you sit at home and drink water. While they worry about what college to choose, you are worrying about if you'll ever even make it there. People may say stuff like "Oh, this has to be so hard" or "Things will turn out okay". How do they know any of that unless they have done it themselves? How do they know how hard it is? Here is the personal story of one such young woman. She said it was extremely hard, but in the end, everything was alright. The rest of this article is her story.

My boyfriend and I had been dating for over a year. He decided to join the army about 5 or 6 months after we started dating. He was 16, almost 17. I was 15, almost 16. That summer he went away to basic, everything was alright. Boys weren't everything, I could wait. We got close, everything was perfect. I waited all summer for his return. School started again, knowing the next summer would be just as hard caused us to argue. But we knew everything would be okay. He left the end of May 2007, by the end of June I started worrying about my period. The beginning of July I took a home pregnancy test. The results were positive. I didn't know what to do, how to tell anyone, or what to think myself. I could only cry. (I live in a small town about 200 people, so word spreads fast, usually getting twisted in some way or another.) My mom was going to kill me, was the only thing I could think. I only told two people: my little sister and my best friend. I avoided my boyfriend's calls for about a week. Finally he knew something was up and I had to talk to him. He didn't say much but knew for my sake he had to be supportive. I could do nothing but count the days until his return. He came home the middle of August. I still hadn't told anyone. About a week after he got back we went out to eat and ran into my big sister. She informed me that she knew. How the heck? Who had told her? It ended up being my best friend. Before I got done eating my boyfriend's phone was blowing up. My sister had run her mouth to my mom and anyone else she could. My news was ruined. I ended up getting my High School diploma through our local learning center, and eventually I married my boyfriend. When I had my baby, he was a little boy, 4 lbs 3 oz and 21 inches long. Four days before I had him they noticed he was retaining water on his brain. A sonogram of his head after birth saw his corpus callosum was missing. My son has complete agenesis of the corpus callosom. The pediatrician told us 2 days after he was born we were going to have a mentally retarded son. At 16, I didn't know what to think of that, and could do nothing but shrink down and cry. We stayed in the hospital for 1 week before he was released. At 2 months old we had to take him to get a MRI of his brain so they could look at the extent of his condition. The neurologist reported that he would possibly only have mild developmental delays, maybe seizures. We wouldn't know until it happened when he was older. He didn't crawl until he was 11 months. He did not walk until he was 19 months. Now at 2 years old, he sees a speech therapist because he says a maximum of 5 words. Now he is doing fine in all areas and only has mild developmental delays so far.

So the next time you see a pregnant teen, don't look down on her, and don't bash her. She has enough on her plate and she will be doing all she can and more than she thought she was capable of soon enough. Thank her for being strong and giving that child the best life she can.

Author Credit: Gabriella Gometra, stay-at-home mother and writer, writes about a diverse number of topics, like ATV mud tires and 4 wheeler tires.

This Article has been viewed 465 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)
» left by Sandra E. Graham
 2 years 57 days ago.
247 fans.
Heartbreaking, but beautifully written strength of what sounds like a fantastic young woman. I have known (my sister included) many young women who have gotten pregnant at a very young age. Thankfully, as yet, I have not met one that didn't show the same inner strength that helped you get through. God Bless.
 
Oh, and welcome to searchwarp.
 
Sandra
» left by Alessandro Monte
 2 years 56 days ago.
37 fans.
That shows how people so often forget what love is, we are quick to judge, criticize, and point all fingers without ever stopping to realize that we are all humans, imperfects, and will make mistakes. We must stop, think, put ourselves in their shoes and remember that true love, forgives, it gives without expectancy, it never leaves, love stays and support through all.
 
This is an opinion from someone who has been there, who at 16 faced a 38 revolver in his mouth even though I had a good job, and wanted to get marry, instead watched without a choice to do anything about it as her father forced her to an abortion obligating my parents to pay for, after a very long night at 5:30 am my mom walks in the door as abortion in Brazil was illegal, and she went with my girlfriend to the Dr. and told me at 16 how my son was picked from the garbage, completely formed at 4 months old, it has been now over 25 years, I have forgiven all involved, including my mom for such a unthoughtful description, but my heart will always miss what I lost that they, and wished people could have had mercy, love, and support us, instead of judging and executing two young hearts.
 
This is the first time I ever spoke of this in a very long time, thank you for your article, in life truly what does not brake us make us stronger...
» left by Gabriella Gometra 2 years 56 days ago.
29 fans.
Thanks, everyone, for your kindness. Alessandro, I was moved to tears by your story. Thank you for sharing it.
» left by Alessandro Monte 2 years 56 days ago.
37 fans.
In my life I have learned that truth is the only way to forgiveness specially to my own self, as to forgive others I find to be easy, and trust me my eyes were far from dry as I wrote it...As you can see in anything I write I always speak from the heart, don't know any other way. Have a blessed and joyful day!
» left by Lori Ghiata Bowser from Winston-Salem, NC 1 year 336 days ago.
Read my new book ... PREGNANT AT 16 - by Lori Ghiata Bowser. I was an unwed pregnant teenager way back in 1974, when legalized abortion was brand new. I did NOT have an abortion. I have never regretted my selfless decision for life for my son. The story line is timeless, and my defensive stand for life is genuine.
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